UNAVAILABLE

When she is out of reach, you flatter her with all adjectives that define beautiful.
When she let’s you in, you do all the right things to show you’re reliable.
You notice her flaws, yet you make her feel invincible.
Saying all the right things, making yourself sound convincible.
When she doesn’t believe you, you tell her she has trust issues.
When she says no, you tell her she wasn’t worth you.
When she rejects you, you point out her insecurities and tell her you didn’t mean it.
When you can’t face rejection you laugh at her knowing she didn’t believe it.
This is modern day friendship so go with the flow,
People say alot of things they don’t even know.

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LUST

We used to be in love.
With love came trust,
But when did trust turn to lust?
It’s something neither of us rose above.

You left for someone else.
Then came back, to find yourself,
Still in love with me.
Even though we weren’t sure, how this could be?

Only this time, you didn’t love me.
You loved my body,
You came back not for me, but for something you couldn’t seem to please.

I gave you all of me again.
Fought everyday, we were going insane.
We took the fast lane, thought we’d avoid the pain,
But there’s nothing good about good bye’s.

Told me you didn’t love me to my face, just wanted a little taste.
On the sex you got high, never understood me no matter how hard I tried.

I gave up,this wasn’t the first time.
I was already dead from inside.
Regret kills me everyday, as the mistakes from my past haunt me,
No matter the fight, you never missed a chance to taunt me.

You will still be in my prayers and heart, cause you were here from the start.
But now I’m finally moving on,there’s no turning back
Loving myself first is going to be my headstart.

GRANTED

I’m always mean to you, never done you right,
Still you’re here for me after all those stupid fights,
You say I take your love for granted,
And I’m starting to prove you right.

I know exactly what I’m doing,
I’m the reason for your ruin,
Only call you when I want,
But you’re not the one ‘I want’.

Whenever,wherever I know you’ll always be there,
But I don’t want all of that, I made it very clear,
I know you still love me, I see it in your stare,
But I’ll just tell you to get over me and take care.

You can’t stay without me,
I know that for a fact,
Everytime I leave you,
You always come running back.

I don’t really care about your feelings,
Cause I’m going through the same,
I love someone else,
So nobody’s to blame.

APOLOGY

Imaginary expectations,
Led us to this situation,
Sorry bout the inconvenience,
Now I have a lot more patience.

I used to think my pride was all I had,
But things were different with you,
My ego used to drive me mad,
I thought I was through.

I let you go and I was glad,
But something wasn’t quite right,
Thought I’d get my life back on track,
Tried to move on with all my might.

Unfollowed your social media,
Locked my heart and threw the key,
Our memories stayed in my mind like an encyclopedia,
Denial had blinded me.

Digested my feelings and eating my words,
I apologized, for expecting too much,
Accepting my mistake made me feel strong,
Cause it wasn’t you who was wrong.

Sometimes when you get too tied up,
You have to cut ties,
I need you to be a part of my life,
Even with the things I feel inside.

LETTING YOU GO

Letting him go was the best thing for her
To set herself free, and learn to just be
Blindsided in love, she couldn’t see
But her glasses are sheer now, her visions clear now
Some nights were still wasted drowning in memories of him
And wishing on rising stars that his words would be true
Here today, gone tomorrow
Should’ve known by now
Smiling face, soul hollow
All he could ever do was fill her with sorrow
Heart already broken, he toyed with her emotions
Tried to make her like him, but couldn’t strip her devotion
Forgiven but not forgotten
She locked his memories in a coffin
She let go of him and her regret
Even though the time she invested in him now had her deep in debt
But he would pay later, of this she was sure
She let him go, no more heart ache to endure

DIFFERENCES

Out of all their differences
One of them was him being a teetotal and she an alcoholic
Being sober was his preference
While she drank to appear platonic
She slurped the wine quickly
And he kissed her slowly
She drank to hide her feelings
He was high sans consuming
Wine from her lips, he was just having a good time
His tongue for her was more desirable than any wine
Crossing all lines,increased dopamine
He told her, “Darling, you are only mine”
Her gut knew he didn’t mean it
But her heart made her believe it
So she kissed him profusely as cupid struck his arrow, she couldn’t retrieve it

HEART ACHE

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My heart aches when I see you with someone that’s not me
Then again I know I’m thinking bout something that’s never going to be
You never leave my mind
Yet if you asked me if I love you? I’ll politely decline
Holding my heart while you hold another hand
You played your part, but you still don’t understand
Never prayed for you but you were an uncalled blessing
Time to pay penance for feelings I didn’t intend messing
She’s your 24×7 and I’m the weekend
Whether it’s you or the routine, I don’t want this to end
I’m not scared of falling,I’m afraid of this feeling
But feelings never come with a warning,they don’t even need installing
I wish I could make these feelings go away but that’s the dead people’s way
This heart ache is here to stay and nothing can come in its way